Driving me crazy

driving me crazyDean cut the engine. I wasn’t in the car, I was out of it. I still had a firm grip on the door handle, but not on reality. We were parked outside some DIY store where a huge discount party was happening.

‘How did I get here? We didn’t drive anywhere.’

‘Relax,’ said Dean getting out. ‘I cut out the boring bits, is all. Up to eighty per cent off.’

‘What?! Isn’t life supposed to be all about the journey. A great voyage of discovery, to find out who I am?’

Dean considered my point.

‘Nope. It’s not actually. We’re on the run; from mediocrity.’

I watched the ten beautiful people in the back of the Mini pile out and stretch back in to shape before oozing inside the heaving building. This wasn’t my scene.

‘I’m not sure about this, I don’t know any of these people, or you, Dean… and how come I know your name and not mine?’

‘It’s a long story.’


‘And this is a short one.’ Dean snipped the air with scissor fingers. ‘I already know the ending.’

‘Tell me it, Dean. Who am I? Dean?’

Dean smiled and disappeared in the quicksand of dancing bodies.


He was gone.

I shouted after him. ‘DO YOU KNOW I AM?’

The music stopped, everyone stared at me. Somebody dropped a comment on the other side of the room.

‘Egotistical prick!’


This story is a continuation from ‘The Nowhere Near Death Experience’.

This story is all natural, naturally told without the use of drugs (which I do not condone) and as a consequence do not need Spam to cure any perceived problem. Haven’t you Spammers ever heard of imagination? No, I guess not, you’re all hooked on Spam.


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  1. #1 by lizy on June 1, 2014 - 10:34

    Fantastic – you must have been fishing in that stream with a dodgy worm!

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